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Player Profile
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Honourguardl
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(United Kingdom)About me
| Presentation | Yippeeee .. just bought a racehourse.. called it "MY FACE".. cant run for toffees.. but its great on Ladies Day at ASCOT.. hearing all the posh ladies in their fancy hats shouting COME ON MY FACE.. COME ON MY FACE!! news flash.. Elton John is to take over from the late great Pavarotti, so the group will now be called "Two Tenners and a Nine Bob Note". UNDERSTANDING YOUR LADY...... 1.) FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right, and you need to shut up. 2.) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour. Five Minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. 3.) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine (see #1). 4.) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It! 5.) Loud Sigh: This is not actually a word but a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.) 6. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. "That's okay" means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake. 7.) Thanks: A woman is thanking you - do not question or faint. Just say you're welcome. 8.) Whatever: Is a women's way of saying "%@&* YOU!" 9.) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "what's wrong" - for the woman's response refer to #3. Finally , the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear " the rules" From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! 1. Men are NOT mind readers. 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days. 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys. 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one 1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really . 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as SEX, WOMEN, MOTORCYCLES, CARS, or RUGBY 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. Pass this to as many men as you can to give them a laugh. Pass this to as many women as you can to give them a bigger laugh |
| Personality | Mischievous |
| Occupation | Chief |
My Poker Achievements
| Date | Event | Winnings |
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Game Information
| Poker Idol: | |
| Favourite game | |
| Structure: | |
| Casino game | |
| Prefers | |
| PokerOnline |
Hobbies & Favourites
| Hobbies | Health and Fitness, Eating Out, Entertainment Movies Theater |
| Favourite sports | Golf |
| Favourite music | Country, Blues, Rock, Hard Rock / Metal, Electronic, R&B / Soul |
Personal Links
| Link | Description |
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My TopLists
Being Happy
- Keep Fit, ThaiBox, Karate, Rugby
- Having Fun, Anywhere Anytime
- Good Food, Fine Wine, Women, Romance,Love Making
- Fast Cars n Bikes, n Custom Bikes
- Music, allsorts mainly rock, blues, metal, country
Bands
- Rush
- Jethro Tull
- Jools Holland
- Iron Maiden
- Queen n loads more
Latest Visitors
| Nickname | Date | |
|---|---|---|
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z Red Hot | 13 Apr, 2009 |
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_Joe DeSanto | 26 Feb, 2009 |
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_zamora1 | 13 Feb, 2009 |
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Thfc_Dr | 2 Jan, 2009 |
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_caminades1 | 28 Dec, 2008 |
