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deaanna
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(United States)About me
| Presentation | ok .. i took some advice from Dr. Phil.. he said to find inner peace.. you have to finish things that you started and never took the time to finish. well .. I took a look around and started looking for these \"things\" i never finished and before i left the house.. i finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of white Zinfandel, a bottle of baileys irish cream, a bottle of scotch, a package of oreos,the remainder of my old prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, the rest of the doritos and a box of chocolates! You have NO IDEA how good i feel.. u need to try this Difference Between Women And Men 1.NAMES: If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara. If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy. 2.EATING OUT: When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a $20 , even though it\'s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. 3.MONEY: A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn\'t need, but it\'s on sale. 4.BATHROOMS: A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott. The average number of items in the typical woman\'s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items. 5.ARGUMENTS: A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that... is the beginning of a new argument. 6.CATS: Women love cats.Men say they love cats, but when women aren\'t looking, men kick cats. 7.FUTURE: A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. 8.SUCCESS: A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 9.MARRIAGE: A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn\'t. A man marries a woman expecting that she won\'t change , and she does. 10.DRESSING UP: A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals. 11.NATURAL: Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night. 12.OFFSPRING: Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house. 13.THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: Any married man should forget his mistakes. There\'s no use in two people remembering the same thing -hmmm...lets see......just a fun lovin girl...love to gamble....hmmm imagine that ...who would ever think to look for me here!!! Something for almost everyone! Why is divorce so expensive? Because its worth it! What do you see when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over? Doughnuts! Why is air alot like sex? Beacause its no big deal unless your not getting any! What do you call a smart blonde? A Golden Retriever! Whats the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? About 45 lbs. Whats the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 45 mins!!! Why do men want to marry virgins? They cant stand critisism! Whats the difference between a new puppy and a new husband? After a yr. the puppy still excited to see you! Why dont bunnies make noise when having sex? They have cotton balls! Whats the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? The porcupines have their pricks on the outside! Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex? Mace will dothat to you! Why did O.J. want to maove to West Virginia? Everyone has the same DNA! Why do men have difficulty making eye contact? Breast dont have eyes! Where does an Irish family go on vacation? To a different bar! Did you here about the chinese couple that had a retarded baby? The called it \"Sum Ting Wong\" What does it mean when the post office flag is at half mast? They are hiring! How do u get a sweet little 80 yr, old lady to say the \"F\" word? Get another little old lady to holler \"BINGO\" Whats the difference between a Northern and Southern Fairytale? The Northern Fairytale starts with: Once upon a time The Southern Fairytale starts with: Yall aint gonna believe this shit... Have a nice day!! Men Are Just Happier People ... What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never get pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. Hell, you can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don\'t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress: $5000.00. Tux rental: $100.00. People never stare at your chest when you\'re talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is not only appreciated by your friends, but practically expected. New shoes don\'t cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can \"do\" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes. |
| Personality | Fun |
| Occupation |
My Poker Achievements
| Date | Event | Winnings |
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Game Information
| Poker Idol: | me  |
| Favourite game | Texas Holdem |
| Structure: | No-limit |
| Casino game | |
| Prefers | Tournament |
| PokerOnline |
Hobbies & Favourites
| Hobbies | Health and Fitness, Night Life, Eating Out, Entertainment Movies Theater, Home & Garden, Online Gaming |
| Favourite sports | Baseball, Football |
| Favourite music | Country, Blues, Rock |
Personal Links
| Link | Description |
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My TopLists
Latest Visitors
| Nickname | Date | |
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Steve B | 20 Oct, 2010 |
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greginohio | 9 Mar, 2010 |
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Mr.Ashraf | 8 Mar, 2010 |
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billykins | 8 Mar, 2010 |
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redparks66 | 4 Jul, 2009 |
